Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Why the fuck did you try to sneak a jelly doughnut in your foot locker, Private Pyle?

Vincent D'Onofrio can't seem to stop fainting

I want, I want Charles in charge of uh, Ginger?

30-year old America's favorite oldest daughter and eventual Baywatch lifeguard Nicole Eggert tapped to be one of the two Gingers on TBS's previously unnecessary, but now mildly intriguing new realtiy show, The Real Gilligan's Island.

Oh, and supposedly Gilligan gets some this time around.

Thursday, November 11, 2004

It's okay to love your students, just don't LOVE them!

Meet Senorita Walker. The 33-year-old Chicago high school teacher is facing felony charges for allegedly paying three teenage boys for sex and plying them with pot and booze. According to cops, Walker initially met one of the boys, aged 15, at the school where she worked, and met the two other victims, both 16, through the student. Walker, who allegedly paid the trio about $5000 for their services, was charged with three counts of criminal sexual abuse and jailed in lieu of $300,000 bail. Walker's encounters with the teenagers occurred earlier this year in her South Side home and at a hotel in nearby Rockford. Walker, the mother of a five-year-old boy, has been suspended with pay from her post as a special-education teacher at Robeson High School.

Are you shitting me? She paid the kids AND got them drunk and high? Root.

Also, Rockford is NOWHERE "nearby" the south side of Chicago........

Thursday, November 04, 2004

You Aren't What You Eat

Man tries to convert lions to Christianity with expected results

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Election Day

Remember the words of Geddy Lee...

If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice

I chose though, in case you're wondering. And no matter what happens, don't blame me, I voted for Kodos.

Monday, November 01, 2004

One of them is not Joliet Jake

So far today, I've found two people I grew up with are in the Illinois correctional system

I can certainly think of sports that have better names

Cornholing is sweeping the midwest